Family related news included tips on how to deal with a narcissist during a divorce and thoughts on how to procure a "civil" divorce. From Oregon and North Carolina we learned about a visiting nurse program that gives new parents important support; and in NYS a lawsuit has been filed arguing that ACS surveillance of domestic victims constitutes double abuse. Lastly, from the Ukraine, importance of romantic connection even in, or especially during, war times was highlighted.
Cory Turner, NPR, July 23, 2024
A new program which originated in North Carolina and operates in Oregon, offers any family with a new baby a no-cost visit at home with a trained nurse. This program was born in response to a grim, American reality: The U.S. has one of the highest death rates of any wealthy nation for infants and new mothers both. Research found that this program was associated with a handful of significant benefits, including a big drop in the number of trips new parents were making to the emergency room and it found mothers in the program were 30% less likely to experience possible postpartum depression or anxiety.
Gina Cherelus, The New York Times, July 25, 2024
Ask most divorce lawyers: The only people who control how long a divorce takes are the two parties going through the divorce. Jeralyn Lawrence, a divorce lawyer in Watchung, N.J. shared: “The more your lawyer can talk to the other lawyer, can have conversations, can collaborate, communicate and cooperate, the easier the divorce process is going to be on you.”
Andy Newman, The New York Times, July 31, 2024
Thousands of times a year across New York State, advocates for families say, parents — usually women — who have been abused by their partners are then subjected to surveillance from child welfare authorities. A law suit has been filed which argues that this practice amounts to “double abuse”: punishing parents who have endured domestic violence by putting their families through further stress, fear and humiliation. A.C.S. itself acknowledges that visits from its caseworkers can be “inherently traumatic and intrusive.”
Constant Méheut and Daria Mitiuk, Photographs by Oksana Parafeniuk, The New York Times, August 4, 2024
Faced with the turmoil of the war, some women in the Ukraine are now resorting to measures they had not contemplated before, like using dating apps or going on speed dates. While the pursuit of love might seem secondary to dealing with missile attacks, power outages and food shortages, many Ukrainians say they need romantic relationships to help them cope with the trauma of living in a nation at war.
Pat Fersch, Forbes, August 9, 2024
The author explained that the narcissistic parent lacks empathy for the child, and the other parent, and will exploit both for his/her own need to feel superior to the non-narcissistic parent. They are possessive, critical and controlling of their children. This makes them a dangerous foe in a custody dispute. The author shared that by disengaging with the narcissistic parent, “Grey Rocking” and limiting communication to the most mundane boring details, you may well find that your narcissistic parent’s addiction to drama will not be satisfied with you and they will move on. They will not change. Only you can change.
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